Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appeared from a distance, running toward them. One of the guys took out a pair of Nikes from his bag and started to put them on.

The other guy, with a surprised look on his face, exclaimed, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?"

His friend replied, "I don't have to outrun it, I just have to run faster than you."

The Secret of Success

– "Sir, What is the secret of your success?" a reporter asked a bank president.

– "Two words"

– "And, Sir, what are they?"

– "Right decisions."

– "And how do you make right decisions?"

– "One word."

– "And, sir, What is that?"

– "Experience."

– "And how do you get Experience?"

– "Two words"

– "And, Sir, what are they?"

– "Wrong decisions"

"Meet Me Halfway"

A fellow found himself in dire trouble. His business had gone bust and he was in serious financial trouble. He was so desperate that he decided to ask God for help. He began to pray.

"God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."

Lotto night came and somebody else won. Again the fellow prayed.

"God, please let me win the lotto! I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."

Lotto night came and he still had no luck. Once again he prayed.

"My God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Please just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order."

Suddenly there was a blinding flash of light as the heavens opened and the fellow was confronted by the voice of God himself.

"Hey come on now, you are going to have to meet me halfway on this. Buy a ticket."